Journal Entry #22

~An Entire Bag of Potato Chips~

There is only a hand full of activities I would like more than to spend every moment of my twenty-four hour day writing… writing blog posts, snippets, poems, and even those little notes I like to scribble myself before bed. 

However… when the writing task is mutilated into that of an essay or a case study, as I am hopelessly procrastinating from at this time, the intrinsic motivation has flown from my body and migrated south for the semester.

As I spend time writing this post, I ignore the fact that this paper is due on Tuesday… three days from this exact point in time, minus eight hours. I ignore the test I have scheduled for this Monday, you know, the one based on all those readings I neglected? I ignore the millions of letters, which make up the thousands of words I will have to skim – not read – that create hundreds of sentences inside tens of books I have barely dusted off from the bookstore.

What day is it? The nineteenth?! Has it really been three weeks?

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Quirky Quotes #12

“It is well that the earth is round that we do not see too far ahead.”- Meryl Streep

I think of these words when I am planning my future. The truth is, I want security without eliminating the element of surprise. Reading off a script for the next 60 or 70 years would be convenient, but where is the fun in that?

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Quirky Quotes #11

“Talent is cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual from the successful one is a lot of hard work.”
– Stephen King

To anyone who is going through the struggles of final week, this blog solutes you. Keep working hard fellow bloggers, at whatever barriers stand in your way.

Revel.

Do you ever feel like you’re bigger than your own body?

The feeling that you can do so much more than you’re pinning for. You’ve been told that it’s impossible, that you’re impossible. It just won’t happen. Go to college, get a stable degree. Do something you won’t regret.

But I may just be regretting it.

I’m overflowing with passion and excitement. I want to revel. I’m trapped in a body that won’t let me. This isn’t me. What if I never find myself?

I want to be someone who people know, someone I can make myself proud of. I know I can do it. Just think of the smile on my fourth grade self, the girl who was getting into trouble like it was beer at a toga party. The girl who always tried to play on the safe side. The one who stayed on track, the one whose still a little terrified to turn off the tracks. Just imagine her face when she finds out she made it big. Or will… one day.

Today I’ve decided that I’m going to make something out of myself. But I tell myself that everyday, so what’s different about today?

Today I had a vision of myself on stage.

And I melted for it.

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Finals Week At A Glance

  1. Dinning hall food has become dessert for the untouchables.
  2. The library is so full they had to make a second one in the student center.
  3. Meghan Trainor has taken over my study radio.
  4. Love my housemates, I just can’t wait to escape them for four weeks.
  5. I’m too broke to buy people christmas presents.
  6. My parents aren’t suppose to agree that I’m going to fail at life.
  7. To the man streaking naked outside my window, you’re doing finals week right.
  8. Who do I track down to get an adderall around here?
  9. My younger siblings get to decorate our tree while i’m here rethinking my life choices.
  10. I built a fireplace out of cardboard. I’m proud of it too.
  11. Can I pack yet?
  12. Of the five days I had planned to study for my exam, I choose tomorrow to begin.

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