An American Dream

Athens, 1939

I was drinking my morning coffee on the terrace, same as I do every morning, with the roar of car horns and ambulances sweeping through the streets below my feet. The buzz of this city pairs nicely with my mood: anxious, restless, and excited. Athens never skips a beat, not even then in 1939 when war is beating down Greece’s door. I lift the welcome mat behind my chair, the place I stash my father’s finest cigars, and light one up before the big journey. Inhaling the smoke from that flavorful montecristo, I remember thinking about giving them back to him before I take off, but then he’d realize I took them, and saying goodbye would have been much more burdensome.

I toss the ashes out from the tray over the railing and make my way back inside, the cigar tucked neatly inside my pocket. Mother is packing away everything I don’t need, the routine of her hands and feet masking the worry on her face.

“Ma.” I wait for her to stop folding my socks, socks I probably won’t need. “Ma, please stop. It’s almost seven, I have to get going.”

She doesn’t stop. Instead, she continues to fold my shirts, my pants, my underwear, and all other items that will most likely be thrown over board if I am caught. I rest a hand on her shoulder, humming her favorite old folk tune. She relaxes and I can almost see a smile tugging on her cheek. “The boat will be cold at night,” She finally looks up at me, “At least let me pack you a few extra pairs of socks.”

“Nicholas,” My father enters the room. His hair gelled tightly behind his ears and gut tucked firmly beneath his belt. He places today’s paper on the counter and picks up his coffee with both palms. I assume it’s so that he has an excuse not to hug me goodbye. “All packed I presume?

“Yes, Papa.”

“Got your bags?”

“Yes.”

“Crew pass?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure that thing will work?” He eyes my white pants and jacket with the navy blue trim, then studies the identification pass strung around my neck.

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Haiku – The Salad Analogy

I am a salad

Tossed with the flavors of life

Fresh and colorful


And yes, I chose to display a Greek salad because, you guessed it, Greek Pride. What kind of salad would you say best represents yourself?

The New Years Manifesto. 2015

1. Look for what makes you happy, look past the sorrowful.

Life is much too short not to explore the beautiful.

2. Find people who inspire you, who broaden your knowledge.

Leave behind the simpletons you met before college.

3. Travel to the most dazzling cities, forget home for a while.

See new sights, learn new languages, try on a new style.

Revel.

Do you ever feel like you’re bigger than your own body?

The feeling that you can do so much more than you’re pinning for. You’ve been told that it’s impossible, that you’re impossible. It just won’t happen. Go to college, get a stable degree. Do something you won’t regret.

But I may just be regretting it.

I’m overflowing with passion and excitement. I want to revel. I’m trapped in a body that won’t let me. This isn’t me. What if I never find myself?

I want to be someone who people know, someone I can make myself proud of. I know I can do it. Just think of the smile on my fourth grade self, the girl who was getting into trouble like it was beer at a toga party. The girl who always tried to play on the safe side. The one who stayed on track, the one whose still a little terrified to turn off the tracks. Just imagine her face when she finds out she made it big. Or will… one day.

Today I’ve decided that I’m going to make something out of myself. But I tell myself that everyday, so what’s different about today?

Today I had a vision of myself on stage.

And I melted for it.

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Finals Week At A Glance

  1. Dinning hall food has become dessert for the untouchables.
  2. The library is so full they had to make a second one in the student center.
  3. Meghan Trainor has taken over my study radio.
  4. Love my housemates, I just can’t wait to escape them for four weeks.
  5. I’m too broke to buy people christmas presents.
  6. My parents aren’t suppose to agree that I’m going to fail at life.
  7. To the man streaking naked outside my window, you’re doing finals week right.
  8. Who do I track down to get an adderall around here?
  9. My younger siblings get to decorate our tree while i’m here rethinking my life choices.
  10. I built a fireplace out of cardboard. I’m proud of it too.
  11. Can I pack yet?
  12. Of the five days I had planned to study for my exam, I choose tomorrow to begin.

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Quirky Quotes

“Who cares about pretty? I’m going for noticeable.” – Veronica Roth, Divergent 

I am not one to follow the crowed, but Veronica Roth, i’ll follow you till your pen runs dry.

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